Manager of domestic-violence shelter knows what clients face
By Monica Young
The Winston-Salem JOURNAL
KERNERSVILLE
The new shelter manager at Next Step Ministries, one of two domestic-violence shelters in Forsyth County for battered women and their children, says she is a survivor.
Susan Bost said she was born into a home with a violent, alcoholic father. Her mother's faith and love made the difference.
"We grew up on 'the wrong side of the tracks.' In first grade I only had two changes of clothes, but they were always clean," Bost said. "My mother was a marvelous Christian woman who taught us to have pride."
When Bost was 16, her mother became mentally ill and did not acknowledge her, the youngest of five children and the only daughter, Bost said.
Bost's college years were ones of confusion and aimless pursuit. She said she felt that God had turned his back on her, and Bost questioned the difficulties faced through her childhood.
During this time, Bost married someone who her mother said was far worse than Bost's father. He told Bost how worthless she was, Bost said. He would call late at night while traveling for business and breathed heavily into the telephone without ever saying a word.
Bost said that he terrorized her, and she felt powerless.
"Paralysis comes with the fear that the assailant will do something to your children," Bost said. "For [women facing domestic violence,] their children become their life. You just can't imagine life without your children."
Next Step Ministries of Kernersville helps women and children when their husbands, boyfriends or fathers mistreat them.
With the help of her brother who is an attorney, Bost escaped her abusive husband. With the help of friends, she hid in a home where she kept blankets over windows.
Her oldest daughter transferred to a new school. Her car was stashed in a barn of an elderly couple miles away. Bost said she didn't know its location, but her husband found it.
Her only outing with her three daughters was to go to church on Wednesday evenings because her husband's sales job took him out of state during the week.
She said she returned home from accompanying the youth choir when a car turned into the driveway behind her. It was her husband. He had discovered her hiding place.
"I understand the fear," Bost said about the women who seek shelter at Next Step. "In the two months that I have been the shelter manager, I have already been subjected to things I have lived through."
Since Jan. 1, two families totaling six people have come to the shelter, Bost said. Since she has become the shelter manager, she has helped children.
Despite the difficulties and pressures of her new job, Bost said she likes her new occupation that she refers to as a "calling."
"I wasn't content in my career in sales and marketing," she said. "I had been searching and looking and praying when I saw an ad for the shelter manager... My heart leaped. I knew this was it. I feel God has prepared me my whole entire life for this job."
With Susan's background in both marketing and human resources, she assists women in setting goals and working to establish themselves as decision-makers in their new fragile households.
Jayne Danner, Next Step's executive director, said that Bost and other staff members help inspire its clients.
"What a wonderful thing to have an entire house staff that is made of survivors," Danner said. "How empowering for the women we serve."